Update Dammit:

Just like the EF Hutton commercial of years past: 'When Kimmah talks people listen' So in a nutshell-Or as close as I can get:

-We went to the beach with friends over July 4th and had a relaxing time. The ocean always seems to wash away any sense of negativity (though I haven't had that much lately.) and centers me again. It seems that it does the same thing for my boys.

-I got hit on by a married guy poolside at the beach. Did that part bother me? Not as much as the fact that he was totally shitfaced and was wearing a Yankees hat.

-Turtle turned nine on the 6th. My sweet little baby isn't so little anymore. He's tall and lean and is not as lovey dovey with me anymore. =(

-Crash's All Star team lost in the double elimination. Turtle's start up in 2 more weeks.

-Turtle & I went camping with Cub Scouts last week. We had a blast!! He went last year but I didn't. I tell you what it was so much fun that I cannot wait until next year! (Even though the 'Smother-er' was on the trip too.)

-Crash left for Boy Scout camp Sunday and won't be home until Saturday. I miss him though I'm enjoying my time with Turtle.

-I not only did 35 minutes of Stott Pilates tonight (Moira is awesome!) I did an additional 10 of an intense ab workout. I hurt in places I didn't know existed.

-Crush..Where do I even start with him? I haven't seen him in almost 2 weeks, we haven't socialized outside of baseball (Except once with a group at Hooters.) yet we talk every day-At least once a day. I don't know whether to classify him as a friend or if I can allow myself to totally crush over him..I really want to crush over him..But I can't if he's not doing the same b/c I cannot allow myself to be fall again and be rejected.

-In fact speaking of crushing I just want him to kiss me one time so I can decide whether the crush is indeed warranted or if we're destined to be friends. Can I do that?

-DB is calling and pulling the sweet good guy routine. I'm not falling for it though....(Just kidding!) Also, my one and only Mrs. Robinson moment keeps coming back to haunt me. In fact I think most of it is due to the Crush and everyone's perception of us though part of it has to do with me not being interested and chasing. (Though I'd like to think part of it is due to me!)

-My sweet bestest friend, Miss T, called tonight and we finally got to talk. Just remember T, he's the sober version of my X. Also remember that he's a window licking, non productive fuckstick who is right back where he started his momma's. (Are we sure that he's not related to my X??)

Hopefully, I have fulfilled my updating duties and satisfied my favorite Drama Queen! :)

PS-If you find my digital camera please return it as there's 327 pictures on it that I need to upload..

What constitutes the game of like??

How does it play for guys? What are their rules? Does 42 minutes on the phone starting at 11:10 pm count? How about always returning phone calls? How about the fact that he has the same priorities as me when it comes to cleaning bedrooms? Clothes everywhere and an empty dresser..Yet the important things are at arms reach like trophies and momentos..How about the fact that we've had a running inside joke for like 2 weeks now? What about still calling me by a name that very few do even knowing the history of that nickname? How about answering the phone while changing clothes?

Even if I'm reading too much into things I must say that there's a lot to be said for making me smile. Especially today.

So..Nothing ventured Nothing gained right???

I was bold last night-Totally fearless (for me) in fact. Until my phone trilled and I had a response via text message. It took me several minutes to work up the courage to check it. After much thought I realized the response that was given was not what I wanted to hear but it was better. It isn't something that you text besides being too many letters for a text it is something to be said in person.

I watched him coach tonight. I forgot how good he is with the kids. I forgot about how passionate he is with the sport. At one point he looked over at me, grinned and I realized that I was gone.

Did I tell you he calls me by my nickname when it's just us talking? You know that four letter adaptation of my name that only those who know me in my online community and very few IRL call me? I don't know how he picked up on it or where it came from but it sounds good coming from him. That in itself is enough to make me melt.